Friday, March 29, 2013

也许,拥有了就会害怕失去,是必然的。

害怕那段夜夜流泪的日子,害怕在每一天每件事每首歌都找到你的影子,却找不到你的时光,害怕独自想念怀念挂念的心酸。

不想失去啊,好不容易才握住的手,如果放开了,我又何去何从。

整个人像漂浮着,没有重心,淹没在回忆里,找不到方向,找不到未来。

他若无其事地活着,笑着闹着走着跑着玩着,我看着想着难以置信着,冰冷得蚀骨。

不想。

不想失去。

posted from Bloggeroid

Thursday, March 28, 2013

早上,闹钟响了。

她起身,叫醒身边的他。

他洗澡刷牙,她躺床上等他。

他从浴室出来,发现她又睡着了。

在她眉心落下一吻,他叫醒她。

早餐可能是简单的自制土司和豆奶,或者饼干和美禄。

有时他和她醒得早,会手牵手到附近茶餐厅吃面。

早餐后,他去上课,她也去上课。

傍晚,他回家,她也回家。

她扫地,他洗衣。他上网,她靠在他身边看书。

衣服晾干了,她折好,他陪她说话。

有时他累了,她帮他按摩。有时她累了,他帮她按摩。

然后手牵手去吃晚餐,可能看一场电影,可能在热闹的街上散步,可能一起坐在某家咖啡厅最安静的角落,他做功课,她也做功课。

他送她回家,然后到健身房健身,她在两人的床上听着耳机,抬腿瘦身。

他回家,拉着她一起洗澡,闹了很久,才抱着脸色潮红的她回床上睡觉。

她窝在他的臂弯里,他搂着她的腰。

她亲了亲他脸颊,在他的呼吸声中沉沉睡去。

世界很大,可是有时候,一个人的世界可能只是另一个人的臂弯。

心很大,可以关心很多人很多事,可是有时候,一颗心只愿意容纳那一个人的感情。

不是怕吵架,而是怕吵着吵着,就散了。

不是介意你推开我,而是怕你推着推着就习惯了,我也终究会失去不断把自己放在你手中相信这次不会被抛开的冲动。

posted from Bloggeroid

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

How to not step back

How to not hide

How to take a step forward

And pretend everything's alright?

My cheeks are wet

But my eyes feel dry

It's killing me

So why am I still alive

I thought this was it

I thought I had finally gotten things right

I was ready to be brave

Even if I was the coward the I was

Why

Why

Why did it all go away

When is my strength gone

How to step forward

When you're stepping back

So fast I can't reach you at all

How to not step back

When even if I step forward

I'm still all alone

I'm a coward

I know.

posted from Bloggeroid

Withdrawal.

A coward's escape.

posted from Bloggeroid

Sand in your hands
The harder you try to hold on
The faster it slips through your finger.

Am I the sand or the hand?

posted from Bloggeroid

Sunday, March 24, 2013

I won't be that girl again. I just won't.

Forever hoping, forever waiting, a life centered on one sole person, always overthinking, always second guessing.

You said that is not what you want.

Well, I hate it even more than you do, cause it's in myself I sense the shame and stupidity from the girl I used to be.

I will do anything to not be that person again, ever. Anything.

posted from Bloggeroid

太熟悉了,这感觉。

想念,但又不敢打扰。

posted from Bloggeroid

Thursday, March 21, 2013

我讨厌你的不耐烦。

虽然我知道这不代表我很多余。

posted from Bloggeroid

是不是太自私了,他难过,不言不语,我却为自己委屈掉泪。

是不是太自私,我明明虚弱疲倦但坚持陪他,他却因为难过不言不语。


他不说到底那么多烦人的事究竟是什么,也许我也不该怪他吧。也许真的很烦呢,总不能我也添乱。

虽然我什么都告诉他。

亲爱的,这种时候,我也感觉不到自己存在的需要啊。我也感受不到你的爱啊。

我明明最受不了的就是见到你难过。

心疼。我会心疼。

不要心情不好就把自己埋起来不让人靠近。这样推开我,我要怎么一直留在你心里。

posted from Bloggeroid

想他了。

他在哪里呢。

posted from Bloggeroid

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

不吵架的幸福是幸福
那不停吵架的幸福又算什么。

posted from Bloggeroid

Sunday, March 17, 2013

就这样走下去吧。

吵吵闹闹也好,甜甜蜜蜜也好。

路很长很长,我们就这样手牵手走下去吧。

posted from Bloggeroid

静止的风,是空气,不是风。

posted from Bloggeroid

Saturday, March 16, 2013

Love is giving half of yourself to another, and filling the space with the half of that person.

Love is responsibility from the heart, caring not because you have to, but because you want to so much it becomes a need.

Love is like a wind up clock, it needs winding to keep ticking through the time.

Love is like spring. There was soil, and there was a seed. Before you know it, there was a bed of flowers, a sea of colors.

You cannot change the world alone, but you can become the world of someone you love. A peaceful, bright and safe world. Sometimes it rains, sometimes storm breaks, but it always clears.

His words were soft and sweet in their uncertainty and apologies in the uncertainty. He was so far away, but his voice wasn't. It wrapped me in the safest, warmest embrace and I fell asleep, remembering his smile in my mind's eye.

posted from Bloggeroid

Thursday, March 14, 2013

我不喜欢你那样想我,那样讲我。

我有多在意,多愿意,多爱,你应该比任何人清楚。

为什么要拼命证明我不是,证明我不要,语出刻薄伤人,为什么。

posted from Bloggeroid

Friday, March 8, 2013

To fall asleep listening to his slow breaths, and wake up to his lips on my forehead.

posted from Bloggeroid

Thursday, March 7, 2013

想你了。

想念听着你呼吸入睡的那段时间。小小的争执,一点点挣扎,很多很多快乐。

一个人的房里,很多争执,很多挣扎,快乐很苦涩。

对错根本不重要,不需要证明,只想我一直在,你也一直在。

不知道怎么走下去,太多对错,太多争吵,太多在乎,太多伤害,不知道能不能走到最后,只知道如果不是你,我根本不想走,一步都不想。

小心翼翼不提以后,因为不安,却没有能力改变,所以好好地过完这一分这一秒。不是不爱啊,怎么会不爱。

怎么会不爱。

posted from Bloggeroid

痛。

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

I guess I will never get used to it
Being on the recieving end of the cold shoulder
The exact shoulder I dreamed on leaning on to, for as long as I can.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013